I am able to remotely access the FTI site due to the continuing ineptness of the FTI IT department ( the most reviled department at FTI) and it's know-nothing staff. As noted in an earlier post, our delay in upgrading to Windows '95 on the FTI server has allowed me this opportunity to exploit the on-line security mechanism (password: dillweed) to communicate with you, the 2 loyal FTI followers.
A quick update on our status to date: I am rested, relaxed, but sadly, witnessing the complete meltdown of the FTI site for the past 3 days. I have spent time on maintenance duties of the Factorcrap Truthometer Deluxe as it seized up while analyzing the statements posted by the band of idiots. Dicky the Peap's comment of support, in particular, caused the electronic marvel to smoke, buzz, and whir until I was able to unplug it. I do note that the staff portrayal of him as a "Nancy-Boy, Kiss-ass" was fairly accurate. I can only assume the Peap was espousing this type of opinion as he mistakenly thought there would be a pending paid lunch on the horizon. I remind you, Mr. Peap, the next scheduled lunch meeting will be on your nickel. (Dicky the Peap: the only guy I know who makes copper wire by playing tug-a-war with a penny.) Otherwise, he would be back to the regular routine of character bashing and indifference of my authority.
My legal council, Shifty, is plotting a strategy for my return with full exoneration. In the meantime, I thank you 2 faithful readers for your continuing support, encouragement, and best wishes. One noted reader went so far as to question the seemingly addiction of following this site in the first place. The only answer I can surmise is that the human curiosity is fickle: Patterned after our real life inspiration from long ago, when the sideshow comes to town, you gotta go see it. Ripley's Believe it of Not has nothing on us.