1) \ˈflat-ˌlīn\ \ˈthiŋk-ing\ the written documentation of actions and observations by a person apparently in a state of no progress or advancement.
Friday, August 17, 2012
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
Mmmm...."Beeries"
I apologize for the pending Old-person post in advance, but this truly is something that gets your correspondent fired up.
I got a phone call last night from Andy Capp announcing he had something for me and would like to bring it down. I had no idea what he was talking about, but figure, that if someone is willing to give me something, I will take it. If I like it, great. If not, I will give it away without their knowledge and no harm is done.
An here is what he brought to me:
Currently in the store, pints of these are $3.99 each. At that rate, I have approximately $75 worth of fruit! Ah, Summertime and the living is good.
Monday, August 13, 2012
How I Spent my Summer Vacation
The lake is over 1900 ft deep and is the deepest freshwater lake in the US. The blueness of the water is breathtaking and (in your humble Executive Director's opinion)every bit as blue as Lake Tahoe. Since it is inside an old volcano, there is no development, homes, cabins, boat launches or any type of commercial activity save for a pair of boats operated by the Park Service that tour the lake. We were remiss in not having reservations, so couldn't enjoy the lake from the water, but did drive the nearly 33 mile loop around the lake by car that includes about 25 turnouts where you can stop and take pictures and just admire the grandeur of it all. This loop is every bit as challenging and potentially scary as the Going To The Sun Highway in Montana's Glacier National Park. I can confirm this small tidbit of information as evidenced by Mrs. Kfred's constant reminders of "Look Out!, Slow Down!, and Watch It!' on the very same type of continuous rotating audio loop that played when we were on that trip years ago. My gentle reminder to her that she was no longer acting in official capacity as the FTI Safety Director during this time, was no longer "on the clock", and would probably best enjoy the tour without the repeated safety warnings, earned me an approximate 30 mile loop of solitary thought as the cone of silence immediately descended over her area of the front seat. For what it is worth, I used the time during this remaining 30 mile jaunt wisely by examining my actions. I soon discovered the faulty logic in my thinking, realized the errors in my ways, and to avoid any further need for further re-education, decided to admit my obvious mistakes and beg for forgiveness as, certainly, I did not understand the true ramifications of my actions. Only upon the completion of that soul cleansing process, could I fully appreciate my experience in the park.
Anyways, should you ever find yourself in the Pacific Northwest and wondering about the true meaning of life, take a moment, kick back in one of the rocking chairs at the lodge, order an India Pale Ale on a warm summer's day, and take it all in. You won't be disappointed.
Friday, August 10, 2012
Thursday, August 9, 2012
Just so there is no misunderstanding.....
The Man Rules
We usually hear 'the rules' from the female side Now, here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered '1 ' ON PURPOSE!
There. I think that covers it.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Ya got nothin' else to say?
No longer suspected, instead, now confirmed: Justin Bieber is an idiot. Some guy that wears a Little Richard, comb-up, girly hairdo, spouting off about Prince William's receding hairline and then passing it off as a "joke" is, well, not very bright. Get back to us in 15 years Pretty boy. You might be surprised what you look like as well.
The increasing personal attacks in the Presidential race affirm my dislike of either of these guys. And the media doesn't understand why Americans are so disillusioned with politics. Would it be too much to ask either guy to tell us what they truly intend to do to help us than snipe about the other guy's shortcomings? (Editor's note to our lone reader: The preceding was the only grumpy, old guy, rant in today's contribution. We now return to the inane and meaningless).
Though multi-functional, some kitchen appliances have limitations. British firefighters say they saved an apartment from destruction after its domestically challenged resident tried to dry his wet socks and underwear in a microwave oven. The fire destroyed the appliance along with the two pairs of underwear and socks inside it, and caused smoke damage to the apartment in Weymouth, a town on England's southwest coast. The fire safety message here is to never put clothing of any kind in the microwave or an oven to attempt to dry them. Leftover lasagna, though, tastes great when fresh out of a dryer run in fluff cycle mode.
I am scheduled for a personal leave of my duties here shortly and will return with new stupidity, fresh idiocy, and updated pointless observations at that time.
Friday, August 3, 2012
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Disappointment, do you know no shame?
It truly is not about money any more. I just want his to end , but, I will never give up. Ever.
Monday, July 30, 2012
Hey Heloise, I got your household tips right here
And, surprisingly, my personal mantra which I actually live by on a daily basis as evidenced by the fact that the FTI toolbox solely consists of 2 hammers: one big, the other bigger;
Friday, July 27, 2012
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Thanks God for the Jackson's
The fact that one side was left out of the estate which is now approaching one Billion dollars creates the conditions for strange lawsuits, family squabbling, and just plain bizarre behavior. Of course, none of this is new to the Jackson's, but, you would think they have enough dignity to keep it a bit more private and not to play out in public.
We all have family members a bit different. We all sometimes think that our family is a bit strange. None of us, though, experience or come close to approaching the type of behavior of the Jackson's. They truly are the standard.
Monday, July 23, 2012
A discovery of some good
During our periodic visit to Superior Court, the judge this past Friday ruled to increase the bond level necessary to guarantee that our judgment is satisfied. He failed, however, to set an amount by setting the matter over until September21 to allow a ruling by the State Court of Appeals whether this whole mess is even going to advance at all. If so, he will determine a number and rule accordingly. If not, this whole mess is over and we collect what is in the kitty and get an order for the rest. Either way, more money is on it's way. The graphic to the right summarizes this in an eye pleasing way.
I wish there were no need for any of this; I am so tired of this whole matter. It really does wear a person down. The one plus, though is that our IT department has garnered some new respect from me. I, for one, would not want to be both hated and reviled. I think "most hated" has a nice ring to it.
Friday, July 20, 2012
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
I guess the motto doesn't have to change
Earlier, a bashful connection of ours, Mr. X, was a huge supporter and major investor in this small, fledgling company. Many hours, tears, and promises for assured returns were spent on the premise that "this thing is going to hit. Soon. I think". Our immediate attention turned from confidence to uncertainty to outright questioning whether X knew what in the hell he was doing or not. (Earlier investigation of noting a primate connection is detailed in the link above.) Regardless, now that Mr. X's choice has been validated by the governmental overseeing body, congratulations are certainly in order.
UPDATE: Apparently X abandoned all hope in this venture approximately 16 months ago and sold his major stake in the company. As a result, any wildly, fabulous gains will not be enjoyed by X or his front operation, Anchorline Investing. There is an upside, however. The need to re-market Anchorline's tagline motto is not as urgent as one thought. They are safe to continue to use "We drop immediately and never get off of the bottom".
Monday, July 16, 2012
OK. That's not bad.
Saturday, July 14, 2012
I can think of nearly 250,000 reasons to be happy
In celebration and as a gift to our one remaining faithful reader, I have assigned the idiot FTI IT dept. (the most hated and reviled department here at FTI) to post a counting meter on our sidebar adjacent to this page to track the money I am supposed to collect. Of course, I really don't think I will see much of any significance, but, it is fun to dream. To date, the techno geeks have been stumped on this assignment and currently, I see no results of their efforts, yet. Typical. But, rest assured: No sleep will be enjoyed, no food will be consumed, and no vacations will be authorized until the damn meter is in place. I may even have to spend some of my new found gains to hire additional staff to perform this task. Of course, by then, I will have the money and have no need to have a meter running. Seems a bit odd, doesn't it?
Friday, June 22, 2012
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Can you hear me now?
Rapidly ascending my list of screw-up companies while simultaneously dropping from the top of my corresponding "Can't miss" list, the good folks at Verizon Wireless are about to momentarily step into the blinding glare of the FTI Hall of Shame spotlight. Like the long running advertising campaign using the clever slogan that title's today's post, I would like to ask their upper management this same question.
I am certain that neither of our 2 faithful readers here are connected to Verizon wireless. As a result, today's whining effort is nothing more than a written catharsis for me in dealing with this issue. I understand the idea of customer service, and prompt personal interaction with the customer. Sometimes, though, the customer does not ask for that. I am ok with self service when I know what I want, can go get it myself, pay for it in a reasonable amount of time, and be on my way. To inconvenience me so they might be able to sell me something I hadn't originally intended to buy by interacting with me doesn't seem to be a good way to operate. It leaves me thinking that perhaps the coverage is a bit spotty.
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
What junk science?
While studying the global warming issue and trying to discover ways that our small population here at FTI can help the world community at large cope with the phenomena, our crack team of researchers and scientists decided to look at the issue from all angles. One of the methods of study and query was to examine the habits and lifestyle of wildlife to determine if a clue existed among them. A startling new revelation might actually have been uncovered.
Our team started out with the premise of why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica. Where do they go?
It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives an extremely ordered and complex life. The penguin is very committed to its family and will mate for life, as well as maintain a form of compassionate contact with its offspring throughout its life.
If a penguin is found dead on the ice surface, other members of the family and social circle have been known to dig holes in the ice, using their vestigial wings and beaks, until the hole is deep enough for the dead bird to be rolled into, and buried.
The male penguins then gather in a circle around the fresh grave and sing:
"Freeze a jolly good fellow."
"Freeze a jolly good fellow."
Then, they kick him in the ice hole.
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Don't bug me
I had an experience yesterday that still leaves me a bit confused. The details are too numerous and, are actually, meaningless. More importantly, it's the circumstances that I find interesting. I contacted a colleague on the other side of the country about an issue which we share a common interest. I do not personally know this person, but rather have had email contact with him on a couple of occasions. He has always been a bit "prickly" (to that I mean "crusty" or "grumpy" as opposed to the term with which I refer to one D., the Peap) most of the time, so, I basically handle with him with kid gloves. I know it is nothing about me, rather, how overworked and under great pressure that causes this reaction. Anyways, in the course of our exchange, he cops an attitude via his written word that truly is uncalled for. Now me, with my magnetic and engaging personality, never wanting to back down from a good insult-fest, immediately prepared to move into retaliation mode. On reflection, however, I realized that such a move was probably not in my best long term interests. I need this guy a lot more than he needs me. No use stirring up the pond for the rest of the time I have to work with him. (I could have devastated him, though.)
I don't understand why some people arrive at work and immediately proclaim, "I am in a bad mood today". Apparently that gives them the right to abandon all sense of cooperation and have an excuse for their surly and don't-give-a-shit-attitude for the day. It's too bad your attitude is grumpy today, but you had better check it at the door because now you are at work. And you aren't paid to be a loner. You are expected to cooperate with all to get your job done.
There. I feel better already.